Cave Triathlon
Gamma is really upset with Org — so she consults with a friend for advice.
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Cast In Order Of Appearance:
Gamma
Friend
Org
GAMMA
I don’t know. I just can’t stand it anymore.
FRIEND
Why? What’s the matter?
GAMMA
It’s Org. He’s completely devoted to the triathlon for the Annual Caveman Games.
ORG (in the background)
Honey? I can’t find my spear!
GAMMA
It’s at the back of the cave, next to the potion ledge.
FRIEND
Triathlon? I thought all he wanted to do was run faster than anyone. What’s the triathlon?
GAMMA
Spear tossing, mammoth riding and speed skinning. Yesterday one of the mammoths picked Org up and threw him into the tar pit. He was a mess! Said it was his fault for not waiting until she had her back turned. But who gets to clean his skin up after that? Me!
ORG (in the background)
Honey? The hyena’s pulling at the baby again.
GAMMA
So poke him with your spear –
SFX: baby cries out
GAMMA
– the hyena, not the baby!
FRIEND
Well, you do have plenty of skins. Why don’t you throw that one out and give him a new one?
GAMMA
Because it’s his lucky skin, can you believe it? And of course we have plenty of skins what with him speed skinning all the time. This place reeks of them. I never wanted cavewall-to-cavewall carpeting, much less the stinkiest cave in the area.
FRIEND
So what’re you gonna do?
GAMMA
I don’t know. Maybe when he’s practicing his spear tossing, I’ll volunteer to help and pretend he hit me with it. That’ll give him a scare! And then he’ll have to take care of me instead of training day and night.
FRIEND
Don’t you think he’ll catch on?
GAMMA
Org? Naw.
ORG (in the background)
Honey? Do we have any moss for my tar rash?
GAMMA
Be right there! That man is clueless. Well, gotta go now.
FRIEND
Bye.
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