The Louse and The Flea
This is one of the cutest and silliest of the Brothers Grimm tales. You should read this just so you know how dangerous it is to brew beer in an eggshell. You were thinking about doing that, right?
Grimmly Speaking: Volume 1: 12 Scripts for 12 Tales is available in both paperback and Kindle – Go HERE
Cast In Order Of Appearance:
Narrator
Broom
Door
Cart
Furnace
Tree
Girl
Spring
NARRATOR
A louse and a flea kept house together.
SFX: happy noises
NARRATOR
One day they decided to brew beer in an eggshell.
SFX: mmmmmm, wheee!
NARRATOR
Suddenly, the little louse fell into the hot beer and burned herself.
SFX: ow!
NARRATOR
So the little flea began to weep loudly.
SFX: Boo-hoo-hoo
NARRATOR
Then the little door began to creak.
SFX: creak
NARRATOR
Hearing this, the little broom in the corner said —
BROOM
Why are you creaking, little door?
DOOR
I'm creaking because the little louse has burned herself and the little flea is weeping.
NARRATOR
So the little broom began to sweep frantically.
SFX: sweeping sound
NARRATOR
Just then a little cart was passing by and it said —
CART
Why are you sweeping, little broom?
SFX: sweeping sound in the background
BROOM
I'm sweeping because the little louse has burnt herself and the little flea is weeping and the little door is creaking.
CART
Then I will run!
SFX: wheels spinning and squeaking
NARRATOR
As the little cart ran, it passed a little furnace. The furnace said —
FURNACE
Why are you running so, little cart?
CART
I'm running because the little louse has burnt herself and the little flea is weeping and the little door is creaking and the little broom is sweeping.
FURNACE
Then I will burn furiously!
SFX: burning sound
NARRATOR
A little tree stood next to a little furnace and it said —
TREE
Little furnace, why are you burning so?
FURNACE
I'm burning because the little louse has burnt herself and the little flea is weeping and the little door is creaking and the little broom is sweeping and the little cart is running.
TREE
Then I will shake myself!
SFX: leaves shaking
NARRATOR
The tree shook so hard that all its leaves fell off.
SFX: thud of leaves
NARRATOR
A little girl was walking past and she said —
GIRL
Little tree, why are you shaking so much?
TREE
I'm shaking because the little louse has burnt herself and the little flea is weeping and the little door is creaking and the little broom is sweeping and the little cart is running and the little furnace is burning.
GIRL
Then I will break my water pitcher.
SFX: glass breaking
NARRATOR
A little spring next to the girl said —
SPRING
Little girl, why have you broken your water pitcher?
GIRL
I broke it because the little louse has burnt herself and the little flea is weeping and the little door is creaking and the little broom is sweeping and the little cart is running and the little furnace is burning and the little tree has shaken all its leaves off.
SPRING
Oh ho! Then I will begin to flow!
NARRATOR
So the little spring began to flow violently and, in the water, everything was drowned. The little girl —
SFX: oohhh!
NARRATOR
— the little tree —
SFX: crack of wood and thud
NARRATOR
— the little furnace —
SFX: sssssssss
NARRATOR
— the little cart —
SFX: blub, blub, blub
NARRATOR
— the little broom —
SFX: long sweep and a sigh
NARRATOR
— the little door —
SFX: slam
NARRATOR
— the little flea —
SFX: eek!
NARRATOR
and the little louse.
SFX: darn!
NARRATOR
All together. Just like that.
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