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COWS and DRAMA: Time For Cows

The Simmental

This on-line script matches what you hear in the audio – a great way to learn English and how to read. Learn more about the Simmental.

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Cast In Order Of Appearance:

Announcer
Reporter
Simmental

SFX: opening Time For Cows theme music

ANNOUNCER

A cow that is everywhere but Antarctica? Today we are talking to the Simmental.

SFX: moo

REPORTER

You seem to be everywhere.

SIMMENTAL

Why yes, I am a very widely distributed cow.

REPORTER

You don't look fat.

SIMMENTAL

I said I was widely distributed, not obese.

REPORTER

But you do have an imposing stature.

SIMMENTAL

I beg your pardon!

REPORTER

Uhm, well, you're big, as in large framed.

SIMMENTAL

I am very cosmopolitan. I am Swiss.

REPORTER

Yes, well, uhm, let me check my notes here. Ah yes, it says here that the first herd book which established your breed placed you in the Swiss Canton of Berne in 1806.

SIMMENTAL

That may well be, but there is prior evidence for my type in many earlier secular and ecclesiastical records. Let us be precise. After all, I am Swiss.

REPORTER

Okay, let's be that way. The first Red and White Spotted Simmental Cattle Association was formed in –

SIMMENTAL

1890.

REPORTER

The total numbers of Simmental worldwide are estimated to be between –

SIMMENTAL

40 and 60 million. More than half of us are in Europe, of course.

REPORTER

Of course.

SIMMENTAL

We have been highly sought because of our rapid growth development –

REPORTER

– and outstanding production of milk, butter and cheese –

SIMMENTAL

Emmenthal.

REPORTER

Gesundheit!

SIMMENTAL

It's a cheese!

REPORTER

What is?

SIMMENTAL

Emmenthal.

REPORTER

Gesundheit!

SIMMENTAL

Stop that!

REPORTER

I was just trying to be polite. If you were Italian I'd say Saluti instead.

SIMMENTAL

If I were Italian I would be called Pezzata rossa.

REPORTER

Sounds like a pizza.

SIMMENTAL

Well, it is not a pizza. It is a cow. Let us be precise.

REPORTER

Yes, let's.

SIMMENTAL

In France I am called Pie Rouge, Montbeliard, and Abondance. And in Germany, I am called Fleckvieh.

REPORTER

Gesundheit!

SIMMENTAL

Stop that!

REPORTER

Okay.

SFX: moo
SFX: closing Time For Cows theme music

©2006-2014 Lishka DeVoss/Kranky Kids®

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