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COWS and DRAMA: Time For Cows

The Florida Cracker

This on-line script matches what you hear in the audio – a great way to learn English and how to read. Learn more about the Florida Cracker.

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Cast In Order Of Appearance:

Announcer
Reporter
Florida Cracker

SFX: opening Time For Cows theme music

ANNOUNCER

Cows in Florida? Today we're talking about the Florida Cracker.

SFX: moo

REPORTER

So you're a Florida Cracker.

FLORIDA CRACKER

Sure am.

REPORTER

And you're Florida's equivalent to the Texas Longhorn?

FLORIDA CRACKER

That's right. But we've been called other names like Piney Woods, Florida Scrub and Florida Native Cattle.

REPORTER

But why the name cracker?

FLORIDA CRACKER

Because the coloring on our hide looks like a firecracker went off in some paintcan we were standin' next to, same as the Texas Longhorn. The Longhorn and I both come from Spain though, originally.

REPORTER

Why yes, I've read that collectively you and various other breeds of cattle come from Central and South America are called Criollo cattle.

FLORIDA CRACKER

Yep. That's as true as true can be. Now us Florida Crackers are smaller than the Texas Longhorns and we don't have the extreme (and we're talkin' big here) – we don't have the extreme length as the Longhorns in Texas. That's 'cause of the scrub.

REPORTER

Scrub?

FLORIDA CRACKER

Yes sir, scrub. S-C-R-U-B. Scrub is heavily wooded lowlands. You see, we've lived for hundreds of years as feral cattle, just wanderin' about eatin' whatever we could find in the wood. If our horns had stuck out too much, we'd have gotten all caught up between the trees and died out. That's why our horns are shorter.

REPORTER

Pretty though. Your horns are very attractive.

FLORIDA CRACKER

You think so? I think they're cute. Now you oughtah see my Mama's horns. They have some very interestin' twists for an aged cow.

REPORTER

Well, I think your ability to withstand the heat, insects and humidity of Florida's long summers makes you a very special cow.

FLORIDA CRACKER

Now you're just sweet-talkin' me now.

SFX: moo
SFX: closing Time For Cows theme music

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