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DRAMA: Ptime Flies Like A Pterodactyl

Cave Circus Trainer

A reporter from the CCC – which provides Continuous Caveman Coverage – interviews a circus animal trainer.

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Cast In Order Of Appearance:

Interviewer
Trainer

INTERVIEWER

Today we have one of the Caveman Circus Caravan. Tar Rockaway is one of the animal trainers. Tell us, what animals do you train?

TRAINER

Well, you see, when I started there wasn't anybody to help me keep the woolly mammoths in a straight line. But I solved that problem right away.

INTERVIEWER

How so?

TRAINER

Big giant pits on each side of the runway. They had to stay on the runway or fall in. And mammoths don’t like taking spills, you know.

INTERVIEWER

Digging all those pits must have taken quite a long time.

TRAINER

Yep, it did. Especially since we had to use our hands at first. About half-way through some guy from another cave brought us this long stick with a paddle tied to the end. He called it a ‘shovel’ and said it would make the digging easier.

INTERVIEWER

And did it?

TRAINER

Yep. Except for the delays from the workers getting hit in the head. Half the men would start swinging and hit the other half in the head.

INTERVIEWER

OW! That would slow things down a bit. What was your next task?

TRAINER

Well, I wanted very much to train the sabertooth tigers, until I learned you had to keep their fangs polished. Not that I’m afraid they’d bite me, it’s just that they drool so much, and it gets all over you, and you can’t get it off.

INTERVIEWER

Right. So what did you train?

TRAINER

My younger brother.

INTERVIEWER

Beg your pardon?

TRAINER

Well, he’s quite simian looking. If he kept his mouth shut all the time you’d swear he was a monkey. So we have this act, you see. He mainly spins on his head while I pelt him with little rocks. The kids love it.

INTERVIEWER

Oh yeah! I’ve seen that act! It’s great! Lots of action! I never would have suspected he was your younger brother.

TRAINER

Half-brother.

INTERVIEWER

Yes, well this has been quite interesting. This is Grok Boulder for the CCC – Continuous Caveman Coverage.

©1997-2014 Lishka DeVoss/Kranky Kids®

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