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DRAMA: Looking For Godzilla's Sandals

Studio Recording - Original Script

When we performed this for an outdoor summer arts festival – they paid us! – which is how we paid for a real studio recording (and also recording our Gone With The Wind in 7 Minutes script).

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Cast In Order Of Appearance:

Mother
Quatay
Shopkeeper
Perfumer
Dentist
Narrator

SFX: music (we used "Down Love" by Paul Westerberg)

MOTHER

Quatay! Turn down that radio!

QUATAY

But Mother, it is the best music of the day. How will I fit in with my classmates if I am not hep to the jive.

MOTHER

Hep your jive some other time. You’re waking up Godzilla.

QUATAY

Godzilla? The sleeping monster in Tokyo Bay who wakes up now and then and stomps downtown Tokyo to the ground?

MOTHER

That’s the one.

QUATAY

Why does he always go for that part of the city?

MOTHER

No one’s ever been able to figure that out yet.

QUATAY

And what’s he doing here in Portsmouth?

SFX: crash

MOTHER

Oh no! It’s too late! You have awakened him!

SFX: louder crash

QUATAY

Look! He’s heading for the Mall of Everything You Could Ever Possibly Think of Buying.

SHOPKEEPER

Run away! Run away! He’s pulling the shops apart one by one!

PERFUMER

Maybe he’s looking for some scale freshener. He’s probably all slimy from being in the water so much.

DENTIST

Or maybe he’s looking for a giant toothbrush to get rid of all that fishy smell on his breath.

PERFUMER

Look! He’s eating the TV crew from channel nine!

DENTIST

They must be doing an internal investigative report.

SHOPKEEPER

But look again! He keeps pausing at the shoe stores.

EVERYONE

What can this mean?

QUATAY

Mother, in all the years you’ve seen Godzilla, has he ever had any shoes on?

MOTHER

No, I don’t think so. You mean -

QUATAY

Yes! Some how he must be trying to fit in with his classmates.

DENTIST

By wearing shoes?

SHOPKEEPER

He’s holding onto a pair of sandals!

PERFUMER

He looks sad.

EVERYONE

What can we do?

SFX: thinking music from Jeopardy done a cappella

NARRATOR

And so they gathered all their friends, turned up the music, and began making the largest, coolest pair of summer footgear they could. Just to make certain they fit, the kids placed the right shoe on top of their Junior High School -

SFX: crash

EVERYONE

Oops!

NARRATOR

- and the left shoe on top of the local High School.

MOTHER

Wait! Put that shoe on top of that loud radio station you listen to.

QUATAY

But, Mom -

MOTHER

Just do it! I know what I’m talking about.

SFX: louder crash

NARRATOR

Not only did the shoes fit, but with the juice of the radio station surging through his body, Godzilla boogied his way back into the water. Downtown Portsmouth was saved!

EVERYONE

Hooray!

MOTHER

Well, we’d better start working on a wardrobe for him. How about some nice Hawaiian shirts?

QUATAY

Aw, Mom.

©1997-2014 Lishka DeVoss/Kranky Kids®

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